Kelby: "The coolest roommate in the dorm"

Kelby. The Kelb-meister. Kelbilicious. Kelby-welby. Kelbers.Kelby is another of my roommates. We don't actually share a room, but she's often found sitting on my or Shantel's bed. She REALLY likes us. (Well, mostly Shantel. Everyone loves Shantel.)

Shantel with Kelby. Oh so precious.

So, Kelby is one of the funniest people I've ever met. She makes me laugh every day. Here are some of her prime jokes (some of the hilarity is lost in text, as much of the joke is in the delivery. But they're still pretty good.):

"Why don't you take a pokemon to the bathroom with you? Because he might peek-at-choo!"

"What do you call a fish with no eyes? ...A fsh."

"What did the beaver say when he swam into a cement wall? ...Oh dam."

"Two short jokes and a long joke... Joke joke JOOOOOOOKE."

As you can see, she's hilarious.

Some more interesting facts about Kelby, in the form of an acrostic poem: I'm going to find a random word starting with each letter of her name and somehow relate it to her.

K is for "Kaleidoscope". Kelby is like a kaleidoscope because she has a fresh and interesting perspective on life. Also, if you try to look through her, you won't be able to tell where you are.

E is for "Eellogofusciouhippopokunurious". This means "good, perhaps very good." This is exactly like Kelby. Sometimes you are dubious about her true intentions, but generally, she is good. Perhaps, very good. (Perhaps...)

L is for "Lollapalooza". The epitome of Kelby, this beautiful word represents a beautiful person. Kelby is just as this word describes, "particularly impressive and attractive".

Impressive: Look at how she is using a textbook as a pillow. That takes serious talent.

Attractive: Uh, obviously.

B is for "Bachelor". Kelby makes all bachelors (age 18 to 23) wish they weren't. They all want her. She normally has throngs of approximately 13 boys over in our kitchen. Also, she has a string of beaus who follow her around campus, like a momma duck with her babies, except they want to marry her.

Y is for "Yam". The yam is a versatile vegetable with various derivative products. It can be smoked, grilled, fried, boiled, barbecues, roasted, and even grated into desserts. It is also a staple crop in Nigeria. This is much like Kelby, specifically the Nigeria part. She is very versatile and flexible. Kelby is also a "staple crop" in our dorm; we all love her. Also, like a yam, she softens when heated and has a light pink skin.

Well, that's about it. Kelby as described by five completely unrelated, and completely unpronounceable, words. (Except for "yam"... Yams relate to everything.)