Quarter Life Crisis

So, I guess today is my birthday or something. It was on this day twenty years ago that I decided to grace the world with my presence. I say "decided" because I was born 16 days late... Even in the womb I liked sleeping in.
Speaking of sleeping in, I wish I could have slept through today. I might be having a quarter-life crisis. (It's a thing). According to a quiz I took online today, I'll die around age 90. That means I have lived 22% of my life already. And I haven't even done 22% of the things I want to do. And for some things, it's TOO LATE BECAUSE NOW I'LL NEVER BE A TEENAGER AGAIN. I have to be all responsible and adult-like now... (probably).

Get out of my mind!

So with everyone moving away at the end of the semester and all my guy friends going on missions, it feels like everyone I know has vanished off the face of the earth. To avoid that awful hole-in-your-stomach feeling, I've come up with a few ways to keep yourself from missing people! It works with friends, acquaintances, crushes, and even pets. So whether it's your best friend moving to Timbuktu or beloved Goldie passing away after a long fishy life (about 14 days), use these tips to stop the weeping as the plane takes off and the fish transcends the porcelain throne to his watery grave.

Goodbye, Mr. Fish. You were a good fish. You never ran away from home or anything.  :(

Cinnamon Challenge

The cinnamon challenge.


I reacted even worse. So basically, the cinnamon challenge is the most horrible decision ever. Step into my shoes and see.

DAVS

DAVS: [dovs] noun Day After Valentine's Syndrome: Condition that overcomes large groups of people, esp. college campuses, on February 15. Symptoms included bloating, depression, drowsiness, and feelings of indifference and numbness.

Valentine's Day has been a dreaded holiday by many since its origins in 496 A.D. It is supposed to be a day of love and joy in the middle of a dreary winter, but often just increases feelings of loneliness and despair. Also known as SAD, or Singles Awareness Day, Valentine's Day is a touching 24 hours of mushiness, doilies, and kittens for cutesy, PDA-ing couples around the world. Despite its short-lived joy, however, Valentine's Day brings more trouble than it's worth.

Rock. Bottom.

In college, sometimes you have moments that make you wonder. Wonder what to do, major in, become. Wonder about life itself. And especially, wonder why you have friends. These little moments are lovingly referred to as "petra deorsum". That's the scientific name for "rock bottom". This has been the theme of my weekend.

Bucket List

If you go to the Creamery a lot, you may have a bunch of 3 gallon buckets sitting around your apartment. There are many things that you can use these buckets for, and here are nine of my personal favorites, complete with disgracefully disproportionate photoshop pictures.

Creamery on Ninth

The Creamery. It's sort of like the BYU Walmart. There are ridiculously long lines at weird hours of the day--like nine o' clock at night. Weird, random items in bins in the back of the store, like q-tips and polka-dot socks. You go there for one thing, can't find it, and end up spending ten or fifteen dollars on something completely different. Also, you can shop there if you have slippers on, but not if you're wearing short shorts or a tank top. It is also Heritage Halls' top date destination. I'm not kidding. I've been on three dates that involved the Creamery.

Also, if you go to the Creamery's web page, down in the bottom left corner, there is a link of "Date Ideas". Or scroll down to "Delicious Dating". WARNING: This content may not be suitable for children who are lactose intolerant... Because it's so cheesy!

Why is the Creamery so amazing? Let's dissect it, aisle by aisle.

Zumba! Because we ate too much.

Two days ago was Thanksgiving. I ate and ate and ate... And gained six pounds. So last night, Julie and I decided that since we are the only ones at home, we would work out a little bit. We looked up some Zumba videos on Youtube...

We felt like the girls in the white pants, but I'm pretty sure we actually looked like the lady in the background in the red T-shirt. Which is why we made sure the blinds were closed. (Look at her around 2:35... That's us.)

We died a little bit, and sweat a lot. But it's okay, because sweat is just fat crying. And there was some fat left over from Thanksgiving that needed to cry. (Holiday leftovers are not always a good thing.)

Happy Thanksgiving.. Eve?

I haven't posted in awhile... Because this week is a holiday week! Tomorrow is Thanksgiving. Thanksgiving is basically a big excuse for America to take a day off of work and just eat. (Because that's EXACTLY what the obesity pandemic needs, right?) The real purpose of Thanksgiving, however, is to remember your blessings and be grateful for everything in your life. That being said, here is a video of my chemistry teacher blowing up a turkey balloon.

Well, that was exciting.

Pumpkin Escapades

Look at this cute little pumpkin. He looks so shy and unassuming, so quiet and friendly, right?

WRONG.

This pumpkin has been creeping around our apartment, hiding in peculiar spots, trying to catch us unawares for days.

Does this post make me look fat?

Food. Every college student dreams of it. The rare weekends when mothers visit and cook dinner cause vegetarians to rebel and eat 3 pieces of chicken. Thanksgiving is euphoria. I'm sure you're all wondering, what DO college students really eat, besides ice cream and pizza? Well, I can't say I'm the norm when it comes to my diet, but I would say I'm by no means the exception either, so here is my limited insight into the dietary habits of Homo sapiens collegians.