Quarter Life Crisis

So, I guess today is my birthday or something. It was on this day twenty years ago that I decided to grace the world with my presence. I say "decided" because I was born 16 days late... Even in the womb I liked sleeping in.
Speaking of sleeping in, I wish I could have slept through today. I might be having a quarter-life crisis. (It's a thing). According to a quiz I took online today, I'll die around age 90. That means I have lived 22% of my life already. And I haven't even done 22% of the things I want to do. And for some things, it's TOO LATE BECAUSE NOW I'LL NEVER BE A TEENAGER AGAIN. I have to be all responsible and adult-like now... (probably).

I'm starving!

Over the weekend, I did a media fast for my communications class. Basically, for three days, you "abstain from all forms of electronic media". This includes telephones, cell phones, radios, TVs, computers, and any other communications device powered by electricity. This means that for 72 hours, I was unable to communicate with anyone besides face-to-face contact. It was especially heartrending because my roommates and best friend went out of town for President's Day. Also, it was my Grandma's birthday and I couldn't call. To occupy myself during this media apocalypse, I kept a handwritten captain's log of my pain and suffering (at least for the first 24 hours), and now here it is for your time-wasting enjoyment.

Friday, February 17.

12:01 a.m. It has begun. The time of judgment is nigh at hand. Power down all devices.

1:09 a.m. Already breaking the rules. Turn phone on to text my mother and remind her that if she doesn't hear from me the next three days, I'm not dead. Power down all devices, for real this time.

8:04 a.m. Wake up from a dream about using my computer. Literally drooling. Disgustingly addicted.

DAVS

DAVS: [dovs] noun Day After Valentine's Syndrome: Condition that overcomes large groups of people, esp. college campuses, on February 15. Symptoms included bloating, depression, drowsiness, and feelings of indifference and numbness.

Valentine's Day has been a dreaded holiday by many since its origins in 496 A.D. It is supposed to be a day of love and joy in the middle of a dreary winter, but often just increases feelings of loneliness and despair. Also known as SAD, or Singles Awareness Day, Valentine's Day is a touching 24 hours of mushiness, doilies, and kittens for cutesy, PDA-ing couples around the world. Despite its short-lived joy, however, Valentine's Day brings more trouble than it's worth.

The woodchuck's 24 hours of fame

Ah, Groundhog's Day. The day we bestow the responsibility and blame of weather patterns upon a small, unassuming rodent. On Groundhog Day, if the poor little creature sees his shadow, six more weeks of winter are "predicted". This whole tradition, however, is backwards on so many levels.

Is there a doctor in the house?

Do you remember that time a couple of flu seasons ago when everyone was scared of swine flu? And if anyone coughed in class, everyone around them murmured, "Swiiiiine!" "He has the swine." "Oink, oink!" Well, I was thinking about that today because, guess what.

Bacon is delicious. Worth the risk.

I'm sick.

Zumba! Because we ate too much.

Two days ago was Thanksgiving. I ate and ate and ate... And gained six pounds. So last night, Julie and I decided that since we are the only ones at home, we would work out a little bit. We looked up some Zumba videos on Youtube...

We felt like the girls in the white pants, but I'm pretty sure we actually looked like the lady in the background in the red T-shirt. Which is why we made sure the blinds were closed. (Look at her around 2:35... That's us.)

We died a little bit, and sweat a lot. But it's okay, because sweat is just fat crying. And there was some fat left over from Thanksgiving that needed to cry. (Holiday leftovers are not always a good thing.)

Happy Thanksgiving.. Eve?

I haven't posted in awhile... Because this week is a holiday week! Tomorrow is Thanksgiving. Thanksgiving is basically a big excuse for America to take a day off of work and just eat. (Because that's EXACTLY what the obesity pandemic needs, right?) The real purpose of Thanksgiving, however, is to remember your blessings and be grateful for everything in your life. That being said, here is a video of my chemistry teacher blowing up a turkey balloon.

Well, that was exciting.

I'M IN A CANDY COMA

Reverse Halloween worked! I came back to my dorm and found a giant bowl of candy on our counter. Due to my roommates and I, it is now half gone.

Empty wrappers. Not sure why they're back in the bowl.

Needless to say, we haven't gotten anything done in three hours. My brain is in a cloudy, sugary haze. I have been sitting on the couch, wrapped in a blanket, watching hulu and eating candy with Kelby since 3:30. We have tried to move or do something productive, but our minds just can't handle it right now. It's like information overload. Our cells are in hyperactive overdrive trying to rid our bodies of 10000 times more sugar than we should have eaten, and it's all our minds can do to keep us breathing and keep us from going into cardiac arrest.

Gimme Candy

Happy Halloween! Today is the day we can wear nearly anything and walk around at night stealing candy from strangers. Not only is it accepted, but encouraged! Sounds pretty great, right?

Wrong.