The Creamery. It's sort of like the BYU Walmart. There are ridiculously long lines at weird hours of the day--like nine o' clock at night. Weird, random items in bins in the back of the store, like q-tips and polka-dot socks. You go there for one thing, can't find it, and end up spending ten or fifteen dollars on something completely different. Also, you can shop there if you have slippers on, but not if you're wearing short shorts or a tank top. It is also Heritage Halls' top date destination. I'm not kidding. I've been on three dates that involved the Creamery.
Also, if you go to the Creamery's web page, down in the bottom left corner, there is a link of "Date Ideas". Or scroll down to "Delicious Dating". WARNING: This content may not be suitable for children who are lactose intolerant... Because it's so cheesy!
Why is the Creamery so amazing? Let's dissect it, aisle by aisle.
Aisle one. A good aisle, plentiferous with fruits, vegetables, and sandwich stuff. Actually, it's supposed to be, but a lot of the time it's just a bunch of picked-through bananas, a few grainy apples, and some wilted celery. Don't buy produce at the Creamery if you don't have to. You can get better quality at a lower price elsewhere of any fruit or vegetable. Well, the onions are okay. Feel free to buy as many onions as your budget and your boyfriend will allow.
"Blue light special in aisle two!"
Aisle two is a veritable sea of deliciousness. It's like Christmas on a spoon. Any and all of your wildest baking dreams can come true in aisle two. They even have cornmeal (it's on the bottom shelf in little cans. Hard to find. But it's there.) This is my favorite aisle, because there is a lot of chocolate. Candy and chocolate chips out the wazoo. And delicious Stephen's hot cocoa-- the pumpkin spice is my favorite. If you haven't tried it, you should.
"Cleanup in aisle three."
Aisle three has a bunch of other stuff. I'm actually not entirely sure what's in this aisle, except for really cute socks. There is probably things like bandaids- which are NOT latex free. Just sayin', the Creamery is prejudiced against people (ME) who are allergic to latex. I have to go to Walmart to get bandaids. Which is why I don't know what's in this aisle.
It's bad enough that all the fun bandaids have latex in them, but then the Creamery has to go rub lemon juice in my paper cut. The paper cut that doesn't even have a bandaid on it because they don't have any.
"We need backup in the freezer section!"
The heart and hearth of the creamery. You can find everything from chicken to vegetables to--of course--ice cream! This is what the BYU Creamery is known for, and for good reason. The ice cream is so delicious. All the flavors are worth trying, but some of my personal favorites are strawberry sundae crunch, peppermint candy, and of course graham canyon. One of the greatest things about the ice cream? The 3 gallon buckets.
This is the only picture I could find. So please ignore the fact that it is on the bathroom floor, next to a toilet, and full of dirty laundry. Pretend that it's in your freezer full of yummy delicious frozen dairy product.
"Wet floor in aisle four"
Another fabulous aisle. This is the aisle where the most money gets wasted. Bread, soda, and SNACKS. There are chips, cookies, crackers... Anything your munchy little heart could desire.
"Order 513? Your burger is ready."
The most expensive and most delicious area of the creamery. The grill and ice cream area. You can get hamburgers, fries, graham canyon, and even mozzarella sticks. I'm getting hungry just thinking about it. I have only eaten there once, after a six-hour frustrating group project session in the library. It was amazing. Like heaven in a paper cone.
Yuuuuuuuuuuum
Last night my friend Trevor and I went to the Creamery twice and then to the Creamery Outlet. Did you know that if you do that, the cashiers will recognize you? It's a little embarrassing, especially when you spend $50 on food and then come back for more.
BYU Creamery... All you could ever ask for in a corner grocery store. And by "all you could ever ask for", I mean high prices and lots of calories.
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